Allow Myself To Introduce Myself

Of course, what the world really needs is another blogger. Heaven knows there is just a dearth of folks documenting their every opinion and mundane existence.

Well, that's a terrible start to this blog. God, I'm rusty and apparently my break from writing has made me cynical. I call do-over. Yes, that's a thing. Do-over!

Take two.

I'm pregnant! Woohoo! I mean, we're pregnant. Pregnancy is one of those bizarre things that's technically "happening" to one person, but actually two people if you're in a union, which I am.

That brings me to my next point. Am I supposed to like introduce myself? Is this like writing a paper where I need a thesis statement or something? How do you get these things going? Or to my earlier point, why am I getting this thing going? Should I declare that? Declare. Really? I don't think I've even used that word since I was a kid playing the card game "I De-Clare War". Does anybody remember that game? I'm old. I digress.

So, we're pregnant. My wife is active duty Army, and I'm a clown. Yes, an actual clown. Yes, I do magic, paint faces and twist balloons. A soldier and a clown. Did I mention we're lesbians? We're just a veritable cornucopia of uniqueness, aren't we? And now, we're going to be parents.

I googled "Lesbian Military Mom" and not a whole lot came up. That makes sense. Don't Ask, Don't Tell was just repealed a couple of years ago, and even still some folks aren't ready to start waving the rainbow flag just yet. So, I figure maybe there will be another mom some day, or right now, who wants to know there's another mom out there like her that exists. She'll stumble upon this blog, and she'll know. Even with the gazillion social networking sites available now, people haven't changed. We want what we've always wanted. Connection.

So, hello there person. Are you wondering what most folks wonder when I say I'm pregnant? Well, the short answer is: lots of sex.

I kid.

We conceived doing at-home insemination, sometimes incorrectly referred to as "The Turkey Baster Method". That's a misnomer. There is no turkey baster involved. If there is, it's because you took a sandwich break and are very serious about your meat being moist. We used a needless syringe. Like many couples trying to conceive, I tracked my ovulation for a few months.  We chose sperm from a bank in New York after many conversations about the type of donor that we wanted. We selected a donor that was open to being identified after the baby is 18. The first month, no baby. Second month, BABY!

And here we are 6 weeks pregnant! I'll use this blog to document the process and progress of the pregnancy. What it's like to be a military spouse mom-to-be, and a lesbian couple. And most importantly, what it's like to be a person.